News and gossip about Britney Spears

Hollywood, CA - In a town where award ceremonies are as common as, well, award ceremonies. One particular award sends shudders down every star’s spine at the slightest mention that they might be included in the lineup to be judged….Skank Magazine’s!

It had to happen sooner or later and the fall from icon to has-been is indeed swift. Britney Spears, once the wet dream of teenage boys everywhere, has been officially elevated to Skank of the Year for 2009!

Skank Magazine voted Ms. Spears, the Skank of the Year for her frequent episodes of self-degradation and ill-timed behaviour. The magazine uses a point systems to grade the slips and slides of certain celebrities. Britney came out on top!

Britney earned over 10,000 points alone in the ratings, for spreading her pantiless thunder-thighs in front of the paparrazi for a series of beaver shots that made tabloid news everywhere. Another 15,000 points were also added for the ‘bald Britney’ look she gave the world. The final points that put her over the top was when she was photographed with Hilton, and Lohan partying it up while her kids were at home.

Along with the award recognition, Ms. Spears will receive a one year subscription to Skank Magazine, a ‘I Am A Skank’ tee shirt, an official Ticket to Palookaville, a CD by Kevin Federline, a bound collection of Spoof stories written about herself, and the hit movie “High School Musical 19″ on DVD.

The award was presented by last years winner, Amy Winehouse, in a ceremony at the Hollywood Salvation Army motel and canteen.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious

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This may be hard to believe, but a usually reliable source very close to Britney Spears says the entertainer and ex-hubby Kevin Federline may be getting back together.

Apparently the time the former couple have been in touch regarding Spears’ expanding her visitation rights with their sons has reignited strong feelings between the two.

Spears also was very touched by K-Fed’s interest and concern about her younger sister, as Jamie Lynn Spears became a mom herself last week.

According to the source, a Spears-Federline recoupling ”wouldn’t come as a big surprise,” though don’t hold your breath for a second trip down the aisle for the twosome.

”Let’s see how this goes … but something [romantic] is definitely again cooking there.”

There has been no comment from spokesfolks for Spears or Federline.

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The mother-of-two – who became an auntie for the first time last week after her teenage sister Jamie Lynn gave birth to a baby girl, Maddie Briann – splashed out $600 on baby accessories at exclusive boutique Petit Tresor, including several ‘Bunsies’ by Bunnies by the Bay.

As she left the store, Britney is believed to have requested a special one-off rabbit toy, but refused to elaborate on who it was for.

Earlier this year, it was claimed Britney had ordered a six-foot tall elephant for Jamie Lynn’s nursery.

The troubled singer - who has two sons, Sean Preston, two, and 21-month-old Jayden James with ex-husband Kevin Federline - reportedly spent more than $30,000 on her niece.

A source close to the star said: “Petit Tresor is designing the nursery for Jamie Lynn’s baby. Britney is picking up the tab. She also ordered a custom made, six-foot tall elephant with a blue bow which she wants to sit in the middle of the nursery.”

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We’re fascinated by Britney’s meltdown, Lindsay’s drink and drug arrests, Amy’s rehab struggles.

Should that make us uncomfortable? Do the media and the public like giving women a hard time?

Some academics think we do, and dozens of them met to discuss society’s fascination with what they termed “train-wreck” female celebrities such as Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan and Amy Winehouse.

The topics for the one-day symposium Wednesday at the University of East Anglia mixed tabloid talk and academic argot. Papers included “Britney’s Tears: the Abject Female Celebrity in Postemotional Society”; “Hooker, Victim and/or Doormat: Lindsay Lohan and the Culture of Celebrity Notoriety”; and “Just Too Much? Heather Mills and Celebrity Transgression.”

Diane Negra, one of the organizers, said the participants wanted to study why we take “pleasure in seeing women brought low.”

“The massive coverage these women draw is only a little bit about themselves,” said Negra, a professor of film and television at the host university in Norwich, 115 miles northeast of London. “These women operate as lightning rods for a lot of other concerns.”

There’s nothing new in our fascination with celebrities. But the Internet and the spread of “tabloid” culture into the mainstream have created a whirlwind in which rumor, claim and rebuttal swirl and feed off one another.

The Web has also helped drive an explosion in the volume of news, rumor and gossip. A Google News search for soul diva Winehouse on Wednesday produced almost 10,000 stories. The AP has run Winehouse-related stories on 12 days so far in June. In British newspapers, the story of the singer’s erratic public appearances, struggle with drugs and health worries is played out almost daily.

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Perhaps working for Britney Spears isn’t so bad after all. Laura Wasser, the sexy attorney that wooed photographers and cameramen with her striking good looks and her sharp tongue and wit is back with Britney Spears. Earlier in the Spears divorce case with Kevin Federline, Laura Wasser dumped Britney as a client in September of last year, according to a report from TMZ.Com.

At the time the Hollywood based celebrity news website reported, “We’re told Wasser has put Spears in touch with other lawyers who could help the singer in her ongoing custody battle with Fed-Ex, but Spears has become so reliant on Wasser she doesn’t like any of the alternatives. There’s probably good reason — with Spears flipping out before our eyes, it’s pretty amazing Wasser was able to get a 50/50 custody split in the settlement.”

Now Laura Wasser is back in as the Britney Spears family law attorney. That means more paparazzi and a little more excitement in the case. The striking brunette is no stranger to high-profile cases. TMZ has lots of photos of the sexy lawyer and will surely bring the video as well.

Wasser has handled a number of high-profile settlements, including those for Angelina Jolie, Stevie Wonder, Kiefer Sutherland, Spike Jonze, Nick Lachey and Britney Spears. She also served as an on-set legal consultant for the movie, Liar Liar. See the TMZ coverage and pictures published here.

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(Jackson, Miss.) - Television star and slut extraordinaire Jamie Lynn Spears gave birth today in a mud hollow in Jackson, Mississippi. Within ten minutes the baby girl was pronounced healthy and also pregnant.

Electing to have her child far away from the Hollywood limelight, a la Brad and Angelina, Ms. Spears choose Jackson, Mississippi because “I couldn’t really pick out Europe on a map.”

With a group of inbred moonshine runners serving as security, paparazzi were forced to stay up to four feet away from Ms. Spears’ vagina during the delivery. Following the birth, however, reporters were immediately allowed inside the gaping orifice.

Doctors running routine tests on the baby girl after the delivery were stunned to learn that the child itself was pregnant.

“Well, I wouldn’t say I’m stunned exactly,” said attending physician Dr. Humbert Humbert. “This is Jamie Lynn’s kid after all.”

Mother and child were both said to be healthy, happy, and without a measurable IQ.

The story above is a satire or parody
It is entirely fictitious.